Submission is EXPENSIVE!

When a woman is submissive to the wrong man, it can ruin her for anyone who comes after. There's nothing like having your vulnerability exposed and exploited. There's also nothing like letting go of the steering wheel, only to have him run you up into a tree. Take a look at children. Children will run and jump off the top stair into your arms because they trust that you've got them. They don't even think about the possibility of falling. They just jump. Now, if by chance you drop that child or the child falls, that trust won't be there. I remember bathing my little cousin back when I was a little girl and the water was too hot. He stuck his foot in, rushed it out and cried a bit. Although I ran some cold water, he cried whenever I tried to put him in. the damage was already done and he didn't trust me.

The point is, some men go around begging for submission when the truth is, they're not prepared for such responsibility. All it takes is one good time for me to be dropped. After that, I step out in front not because I'm a bitch who wants to control men. It's because I have children who didn't ask to be here. I chose to bring them here. Because of that, I don't have time to gamble on a man's ability to carry us through to the finish line. Survival trumps a man's ego and no one has time to stroke him and at the possible risk of the entire family. To be honest, I still have yet to have someone explain to me what submission is. For the life of me, I can get a legible, valid breakdown. So far, examples I've been given range from upkeep of the home to preparation of meals and clothes, all things I'd do regardless, lest I stink, starve and live like livestock. Not speaking when the other person is, being respectful, being loving, and all things of the like appear to be basic, common acts of love and respect, not limited to one particular biological sex. So based on those examples, submission appears to be a one way street, not a dead end road. 

Based on my experience, the men I've seen begging for submission don't seem to realize how major the responsibility that comes attached is. You've got a great deal of work ahead of you, Sir, and you must be on point. You can't afford to drop the ball, not if a constantly agreeable woman is what you seek. Some of you who require that a woman be in total submission need her assistance to keep the home afloat. You need help with the bills and can't afford to without her financial input, yet you want her to function as a subordinate or understudy? You can't afford her the opportunity to quick her job. Then again, some of you have been known to have her quit her job and apply for welfare so you're both kinda like in submission to the government, but that's another topic. The point I'm making is that while many of you desire submission, all you can really afford is cooperation and there's nothing wrong with that. Society has taught men that it is there nature to be the boss of everything and everybody and that there is a NEED for them to be in control. You know, because apparently, men will DIE if they don't get to be in charge of everybody. Please stop teaching that men will perish and begin to wear dresses if they're not regarded as the heads of household. I would like to think that in a house with 2 functioning adults, that no one would need to be hailed as the Head of the household unless they had some other issues that needed to be worked out.

What type of King of Zamunda stuff are some of you really on? Even Prince Akeem was turned off by a complete yes woman. I also notice that men who claim to want these totally agreeable women grow bored with them. There appears to be something within human nature that requires challenges. these men will be found cheating on their sweet, submissive wives with hellcat women who talk back and aren't afraid to disagree. They begin to trample, step all over, and mistreat the very type of woman they've been trying to shape and mold. While some believe that women are running around convincing other women not to submit, you'd do best to look toward the men they've tried it with who TAUGHT them that's it's safer to have a voice and use it, along with your good sense followed by your feet and possibly your luggage. If you knew how hard it was for some women to talk their girlfriends and other loved ones out of financially, physically, emotionally and verbally abusive relationships, you'd realize just how ridiculous you look and sound trying to blame other women for keeping women from minding or obeying men. It just doesn't work that way.

Just something to ponder.

Nothing Like Family

I can recall hitting my brothers with everything from massive bricks out of the rock garden to throwing hot grease in their faces and do you know why? Because I refused to be their punching simply because they were older and male. My oldest brother jumped on me while pregnant with my 2 oldest children and while I jumped back, it was something I would have rather not dealt with. The sorry ass women in my family would always protect these animalistic males by bailing them out of jail to lying to the police once they arrived about what happened. I often felt alone and would even run away and seek refuge within other families because of reckless my family was. There really was no sanctuary for young children and women within my bloodline.

While neither of my brothers are beyond beating on women, my eldest brother beat a woman almost to death while my cousins, my mother's Sister, and her mother looked on. He did all of this while her 8 year old son looked on and screamed hysterically. He left his boot prints on her body, hit her with family size canned fruit till he split her skin, and then this 300+lb gorilla held both her hands in one of his, then proceeded to punch her unconscious with his free hand. Once he saw that she was lifeless, he then dragged her down the stairs of the front porch and once she was to the walkway, he proceeded to smack her face repeatedly in an effort to awaken her. Yeah, that's how you awaken a woman you just beat unconscious. you take your gorilla paws and slap her further into it.

Someone had the decency to call the police. He then jumped over the banister of the porch, took his shirt off alongside of the house, and ran off. When the woman's son tried to tell the police what happened, including trying to tell them about other times which included him busting the child's mouth open as he tried to help his mother, my grandmother told him to shut up, told the police he was lying and the whole 9. Needless to say, my aunt, the same aunt who had her teeth knocked out by him as well, opted not to speak up on this unconscious woman's behalf.

Once I got over the initial shock of my grandmother's death, I realized that I wanted her to die. She died a slow and horrible death, too. She would call my name each and everyday when she stayed with us. The night she died, my aunt said she kept calling my name, all the way up until she left. While I don't know how true that is, I hoped she saw my face before she took her last breath. I hope she recalled all her betrayal of women in general, the times she allowed my grandfather to beat her senselessly in front of her children, not realizing how it would damage them later on in life. My mother had a deep seated hatred for my grandmother, her mother, for not leaving him. My aunt, because she was his favored child, can't seem to recall any of the abuse. She just remembers them sleeping in the car while parked in the lot of the train station.

As a women's activist, I laugh when people talk about my hatred of men. "Oh, she must have been hurt, or dumped, and had her heart broken." Yeah, while all that sounds good, here's the real story. My initial pains all come at the hands of women. It comes at the hands of women who were supposed to love and protect me, rather than allow me to be ravaged while they stood by and said nothing. Each and every woman in my immediate family has done this. I mean from lying to the police to protecting the savage males who seem to be birthed from our family tree. I'm talking stories ranging from my uncle having shot the mother of his children and her friend right in his mother's, my grandmother's living room, to the physical assault of pregnant women, I've got a lifetime worth of horrifying tales to tell.

Well, I plan to tell those stories. I have every right to tell those stories. Far too many women are told to protect their families by keeping their mouths shut and those stories eat them from the inside out. Personally, I don't give a fuck about the a family name. I'll speak until my soul bleeds truth and my wings get lighter and I'm able to fly minus the regret of not killing these people myself. Everyday I wish I had forgiven less, stood up more and defended my own honor. I allowed people to hug me and say that they were sorry far too many times while later, doing the same thing. Today, I've got relatives who refuse to step in my presence because they know it's the equivalent to stepping on a landmine. Some smile and even pretend not to remember some of the atrocities that took place. Well, I remember. I remember it all like it were yesterday. My children can tell by the look on my face when I'm thinking about it. They'll say,"What are you thinking about and are you cussing to yourself?" Yeah, that's how I know it's time for me to get it out.

Don't remain silent for the sake of protecting anyone's image. Your mental health trumps reputation each and every time.

The Smiling Mammy Overplay for the Underlay

A typical teaching among women is how to raise men. No, not children. I'm talking grown, adult males. Of course, the flip side of this teaching is the fact that women can't and are not to attempt to raise male children. A male child's formative years should only be lightly grazed by a woman. She should never be found as the primary caretaker of a boy child because it likens his chances of growing up to develop a desire for penis, hairy chests and asses, women's clothing, gossip, Tyler Perry Movies and all things that apparently black women love to do. You know, because it doesn't really have to make sense as long as you can get a bunch of ignorant and uneducated people who suffer from mass cognitive dissonance to agree with it. Mass stupidity has a tendency to spread like wildfire.

So with all of the above mentioned, how is it that many of these same beings are teaching that women are to better adult males? You mean to tell me that I am incapable of raising a child into a functioning man, but can somehow manage to turn a box maker into an English Furniture Carver? Of course a layman would try to convince a woman that she could somehow morph him into a the CEO of the next Fortune 500 Company. It's all apart of the game. You teach women to settle so that you're capable of getting one. Even women are and have been teaching this madness and based on their own desperate experiences. Many of them are with the same box builders they started out with and do you know why? Because you can't raise a grown man. You can't do the job that some absent minded mother and/or absentee father may have failed to. Furthermore, you can't reconstruct his will nor his DNA. Successful men are oft times "Self Made." I'm not saying that they are built sans external input. No man or woman is an island and there's not a living organism on the planet that's independent. What I'm saying is, these men have a degree of ambition that with or without you, they're going to be something because they want to be. The way many of you speak, you would think that a single man was incapable of making something of himself.

What good is it to teach that men are to be heads of the household while in the next breath, teaching that men are to depend on women for their development? When a man is found behaving poorly, you look to his mother and this is the case even if the father is involved. They deem women the first teacher, but hold us responsible as if we're to be the ONLY teacher. If you find women who are acting as the first teachers, it's because the men have fallen off tremendously. Even while in the womb, the father can familiarize himself with his unborn child to where that child will recognize his voice once here. Once that child is birthed, it is the responsibility of all who agreed to be responsible to teach that child and at the same damn time. Some of you use this "woman is the first teacher" and "75% of the work is with the woman" mantra as cop outs and and scapegoats to relieve yourselves from daddy duty. If 75% of the work is with women, leaving men with a lagging 25%, then that means it takes more than one of you to make half a man. We haven't even scratched the surface of the whole.

When a man is found cheating, you blame women who made themselves available. You say things like, "A man will only do what a woman allows." I would think that a man's duty was to measure, to calculate and see if a thing were worth doing. But what natural head chief of staff of the household just does whatever is available, because it's available? Crack, Heroin, and sheep are available, too. Do you do them simply because they're available? Such a mindset doesn't seem capable of being in charge of self, let along an entire household containing other human beings. But the way many of you speak of men, you would think that they were mindless penises that blow whichever way the wind does. Feminist, such as myself, attempt to hold men to a higher standard because many of us believe that you should be functioning at a much higher standard. We don't believe that a woman's outfit, sexual offerings, or anything of the likes is enough for you to be given a pass to bypass respect, responsibility, manners, and common courtesy. Many of you don't have to really be men because women have been made to be your alpha and omega, your crutch and your cast, but only when you've done something wrong. When it's time to receive rewards, women are expected to be silent and support you in all YOUR endeavors. God gets the first shout out, then your real mama, and then comes you. But when it's time to place blame for the murder rate, infidelity, poverty, the divorce, the gay community, the prison rates and the list goes on, Mama will always be there to carry the blame.

In summation, if a man is to look to women for the sake of his development, then a greater discussion needs to be had. Now, we're pulling up on the talk of submission. A student is to submit to their teacher. If that teacher is me, then I am who you are to submit to. A teacher nurtures and supports their student. Many of you may not know this, but what you're teaching is men in submission to women and I know you don't want that. Once the work is done, you want the teacher (woman) to submit to you, the student (man). So basically, you want us to train you to be our boss. Yeah, because that makes perfect sense...no. No it doesn't. But anyone who wants to be in charge of something has to be prepared to qualify for certain tasks. Those who truly aren't prepared for such tasks will continue to seek scapegoats, be it their mother, their ex girlfriends, or their imaginary girlfriends and mothers. Imaginary girlfriends and mothers are celebrity women that these men sometimes tend to blame for their emasculation. Nonetheless, the Smiling Mammy is loyal to a flaw and countless numbers of men go women who represent that archetype when found in a bind...

then they get on social media and talk shit about those very same women behind their backs.

Just something to ponder.

Women Are the Greatest Liars

There has always been back and forth between men and women when it comes to who lies more. Then again, no there hasn't. For the most part, the underlying idea is usually that men lie and cheat most. Well, I call bullshit. Women are among the greatest of liars and this is made possible due to the arrogance of men. Men also make amazing liars out of women. However, men and their high emotional states are the reason that many women find themselves afraid to tell the truth or withhold their intentions in the first place.

One of the greatest lies ever told is that women are more emotional than men. In fact, that lie has been told and repeated so often that many have taken it on as truth, including women. Because men show emotion differently, they're thought not to be as emotional.Bit mistake. Let's take a closer look at this. Do men destroy property? Do they cry? Do they stalk Do they hit, do they kill? According to statistics, not only do they do this, but at a much higher rate than women. There are plenty of men filling the prison due to what they call, "Crimes of passion." Surely, taking someone's life and/or kicking someone's door down is an emotional act of the highest order. That being said, because male dominated society has taught men that it is in their nature to desire things that are against the nature of a woman, many men can't handle women treating them in similar manners that they've treated women. That coupled with being forced to withhold emotionmakes for an overreaction.

Let's discuss infidelity. Do women cheat? ABSOLUTELY! Do women get away with it? ALL THE TIME! Do you know why it's so easy for women to cheat? Because men have allowed themselves to be convinced by other men that when a woman really loves them, the possibility of them cheating with another man doesn't exist. This is what happens when you allow men to tell you what women are capable of and because women don't want to lose their chance at being someone's wife, they go along with the lie, while lying themselves. Of course, I'm not saying that there aren't women who haven't mastered monogamy. But don't you believe for a second that monogamy is innate within women simply because we're women. We have the same needs, desires, and feelings that men do. But in an effort to protect their feelings, men will lie on nature, will lie on science, and will lie on their gods and say that women are wired from birth to be with one man. What you'll find in all of this is that no one has ever asked an HONEST WOMAN what she wants and needs. Some of the largest "whores" on the planet are the ones teaching modesty in dress, chastity among men, and one man per lifetime. Now I'm using "whore" based on the very standards these self proclaimed righteous women have set in place. If you know any of these women personally or have experienced them personally, you know that they're lying their hind parts off. Their means of showing cleavage is bragging about their cooking skills and ability to parent, or so they'll have you think.

Men have been parroting the notion that you can't turn a hoe into a housewife, yet these same men want large amounts of hoe in their housewives. They want this breed of "Virgianic Hoe." A Virgianic Hoe is a woman who although she hasn't been with a man or more than one man, she magically learned to deep throat penis without gagging, pop it on a handstand, swing from chandeliers, and take it in every nook and cranny without complaint and all while throwing it back. They seem to want inexperienced women who have the skills of a well seasoned prostitute and life simply doesn't work that way. Because women know this, many will play that role to the fullest. They lie about the number of partners they've had whereas the men they're hiding from will proudly and gladly admit that they've lost count of how many women they've laid with and do you know why? Because they know that women are accepting of it. So basically, you've got women who will seek, accept and remain with men who are too weak to handle their truth, yet smile and turn a blind eye to the past of men Do you see why women are afraid of sharing their truth? It is because their men simply can't handle it. They end up having competitions in their head with your past lovers that you know nothing about. There is this part of them that wants to know that they were able to score you because they were the absolute best. It helps them to sleep better at night.

As women, people have a hard time believing that we are thinking creatures who. This is why we are told what and how we feel. This is why men, in their arrogance, will teach other men that we are so emotionally connected to men after we have sex with them. Just so you all know, women can separate sex from love and we do it quite often. While some of you think that we're dickmatized, meaning the penis is the glue that binds, you should know that that's very rarely the case with many of us. Sometimes, it's everything else you bring to the table that holds us in place. this is why you have women who once the relationship is over, they're talk about your little penis or your bold stroke. The truth is, all of that is likely true. However, the sex is good because it's with a man we love. It's the overall moment that's good. We want you to feel good about your penis regardless to how small it is or how weak your stroke because we love you and there's nothing Mr. Better Dick around the corner can do to change that. You've got men who are great in bed and still get rejected by certain women. Now what some of you may be confusing is the fact that some women have crushes or deep feelings about men prior to sleeping with them, and those feelings go into overdrive once sex is involved. But to say that ALL women are such emotional creatures who want to marry every penis they engage with is a massive lie.

Another myth, and this is such a precious one, is the one that teaches that women are designed for one penis only. Yes, another male biased teaching perpetuated by men who can't sleep at night unless they know "it's theirs." Oh you poor, delusional soul. Clearly this isn't the case because if it were, your wives, daughters, mothers and grandmothers would be able to count the number of partners they had on one hand. I know, I know, your grand maw maw was with your grand paw paw for 87 years and never once did she stray. Yeah, because grand maw maw would sit and discuss that with her grandchildren, right? I know, I know, Feminism has women thinking it's alright to have more than one man. Unfortunately, nature beat Feminism to that. What I want many of you to stop doing is creating gods that seem to favor men having all the fun. You all seem to have been constructed in a manner that allows you to to slip and dip your joysticks and all while remaining blessed and highly favored. Because science won't support your fallacies, you go pulling out your holy books promoted by holy crooks to prove your points that never seem to contain sound reason. Also, stop telling women that they keep a piece of every man that sleeps with them. It's as if you all literally make things up as you go. You mean to tell me that a woman is so passive that she can't determine what man leaves a piece of himself behind? Now THAT is what I call the epitome of loose. It's just more pseudo, made up as you go science to help fuel the same ancient lies.

I said all this to say that women and men aren't as different as we'd like to believe beyond the process of childbirth. Both men and women need to see our parts played in the upholding of double standards we experience. The lying, the cheating, all will continue until we learn to respect each others nature and if we can't, we need to learn how to move on and find people who better suits us. But to promote lies in an effort to ensure our comfort levels does more harm than good. We don't even have to broadcast, announce, and display everything we do. It's not about telling each and every gory detail of our loves and lives. It's about respecting the space of all involved and keeping in mind what's most important at all times. We are responsible for our actions and must measure how our actions affect those whom we're involved with.

The truth won't hurt so bad if you stop resisting.

The Negative Side Effects of Gender Biases on Boys

Whenever the sexual abuse of women and girls at the hands of men becomes a topic, I always notice that a man conveniently mentions the sexual abuse of boys at the hands of women, implying that we as women ignore such acts. When men ask, "what about the women who sexually abuse boys," I always direct them right back to the menfolk. I swiftly direct them to the men who boast and brag about having sex with older women in their childhood. I direct them toward the dudes who purchase adult prostitutes to put on their sons, nephews and so on. I remind them of the movie "Sweetback's Revenge" where the movie began with an obvious adult woman having sexual intercourse with an obvious young boy. The truth is, far too many men see it as an accolade to have landed an adult woman in bed as a youngster.

Dear Menfolk,
Many of these messes, you all are going to have to clean up among yourselves. The trash you keep stepping on and tripping over came from your own backyards. Another issue is the fact that I don't think those of you who bring up sexual abuse at the hands of women are concerned in the least bit. You just throw it in for the sake of winning a debate. As women, there is an overall disgust that many of us feel at the notion of a young girl, even if that young girl is considered a legal adult, being with a much older man. My question is, when are more men going to show the same degree of consistent outrage rather than pride in such acts? Antwone Fisher was one of the most earnest depictions of sexual abuse of a male child at the hands of a woman that I've seen in cinema and it was actually depicted as a despicable act. It showed how traumatized he was, still having been a virgin in his adult years not simply because he decided to hold out. It was the reason he held out. He wasn't comfortable with the idea of intimacy with a woman as a backlash of him having been raped by an adult woman as a child.

Men are going to have to take more of an interest in the sexual abuse of young boys at the hands of women, the same way you take such an interest in it happening at the hands of another man or boy. Far too many of you seem to be more concerned with same sex sexual abuse of male children because in your minds, that's what makes men gay. Many of you all would rather have your male children sexually molested (because you don't view it that way) by a grown woman than to have a consensual and age appropriate relationship with another man. You even foolishly think that homosexuality is simultaneous with male on male child molestation although according to statistics, your average pedophile is indeed, a heterosexual. This isn't a bashing of men. Hopefully, you'll take it as enlightenment on your own degrees of tolerance and really ask yourself why you tolerate and even encourage such double standards. Now if you're just looking to win an argument, keep throwing up women sexually abusing boys. But if you truly and sincerely want the same judicial handling of women that you see of men, your REAL LIFE attitudes are going to have to change. Some of you will go as far as to kill the man who touches your male or female child, whereas you'll try to see if you can get next with the women who does the same to your boys.

Black Women, Do Yourselves a Favor and Have Standards

Throughout my life, I've taken in stray pets of all kinds. When I was a little girl, I brought in birds with broken wings, lost cats and puppies, tried to feed and make pets out of possums and the whole 9 yards. I always had the desire to help someone, even if it meant that I didn't have much left for myself. As life went on, I applied this same mentality to men.

Back when I was making white collar money, I ended up with a guy who made $6 an hour. He was nice, could still count the number of women he had been with on one hand, had a nice smile, was very quiet and square. He had 2 children from 2 different relationships and was just an all around nice guy. My standard for dating him was absolutely ridiculous. I said to myself "OMG! Here's a guy who would rather work for $6 an hour when he could be selling drugs and so on." I basically praised him for doing things he should have been doing. Never mind that he lacked ambition, was being paid under the table, and refused my offer to put him through school to become a licensed mechanic so that he could make some real money some day. The fact that he was nice and worked for $6 made him alright with me.

Overall, I've always settled when it came to the men I've dated because my only real standard was that he NOT be a thug, NOT be abusive, and NOT be a pedophile. I thought settling is what I was supposed to do in order to be fair. I always felt that I would  be able to ensure that money would be no issue. There was a time when I thought I had a penchant for attracting men who had done lengthy bids in prison, that's until I realized that prison has been systematically built into black culture which simply made it very highly likely that I would. I can recall talking to men about escorting me to Libraries and Museums thinking it would help them. I can recall handing out college applications. I can recall trying to convince current dope dealers that it was alright to work at Home Depot and that it doesn't make you less of a man. I can also recall being laughed at by those who looked on. I really thought that it was my duty to save men who didn't ask for my help in that regard. Some would talk to me like they wanted change but I couldn't vouch for their sincerity since they kept selling dope. I found myself feeling sorry for black men all the time so I tried to wrongfully take some on as science projects. I would listen to them vent, then come up with ways to fix what they were venting about and unbeknownst to them.

I've only had 4 serious relationships in my whole entire life and I swear, I've turned down prime stock men in exchange for what turned out to be FARM STOCK! I thought that it was my duty to give black, poor, working class and struggling men a chance. Besides, I always knew my potential. I never felt that I'd grow up and NEED a man to financially secure me so it was nothing. During the times when it was visible that I was financially well off, men would make comments like, "Oh baby girl, I'm a broke ass nigga but if I wasn't, I try to get atchu." Then, you had those who didn't care that they were broke and still tried. I actually felt bad turning men down because I've always had a problem telling people "no." I never wanted to hurt anyone's feelings. Then as I got older, I realized just how dangerous it could be to say "no" so I always said "yes."

If I could look back and advise my younger self, I'd tell her to "JUST SAY NO!" It took me too many years to realize that I didn't owe it to anyone to give them a shot or a chance simply because they asked or because they did what they were supposed to do. This is why I admire my daughter's take no shit attitude. I don't tame her in that regard as long as she respects herself and others. My mother and father have always been pit bulls. They've always been financially wealthy, mean as hell and hard on folks, ESPECIALLY the poor. I would be so ashamed at the way they spoke to and handled people. Both their mantras for me were "fuck a man, get your education, get a job, and get money. That way, when you need to tell a man to kiss your ass, you can." My father stressed to me not to ever date a poor man who couldn't afford me. My mother stressed to me not to ever be poor. I took heed to their messages far too late in life, but at least I got it. After numerous bumps in the road and on the head, by George, I think I've got it.

My overall point is that as women, especially black and brown women, we really need to examine why we make the decisions that we make when it comes to our mates. In fact, we owe it to ourselves. Why are we choosing and/or remaining with abusers, farm stock, men who we're not physically attracted to and not financially or goal compatible with? Do we feel as though we owe these men and why? It took me years to release these mental and emotional shackles and now doors are really beginning to open up for me because of it. Are you a slave to a culture that repeatedly fails you, neglects you, and tells you to take it even if and when it hurts? Are you the slaves, of a slave? If so, what's the ETA on your deliverance from this voluntary slavery?

You don't have to answer to me. This is a conversation best had with yourself and now, but ONLY if it applies.

Post Traumatic Delete Syndrome (PTDS)

There is a SERIOUS and GROWING issue among us here in Facebookland. There are those of you who simply can't stand being removed as a friend from someone's Facebook Friend List. The fact is, nothing in your life is going to fall apart if someone decides they no longer want to be connected to you and if it does, then you had issues before, and unrelated to that person. For you to stalk, lurk, and find any and every means by which to get the party who deleted you to notice you is not only disturbing, it's quite sad and says that you've invested far too much of yourself into this world of social networking. What you suffer from is something I like to call PTDS (post traumatic delete syndrome). This is a disorder that is quite embarrassing even if you don't recognize it. There are side effects of this disorder are mind altering and distorts ones view of reality. The side effects are as follows:

Delusion- This is typically a coping mechanism used by disgruntled Facebookers. They have delusions of being too real, too honest, too beautiful, intimidating, or magnificent. They convince themselves that there was something so amazing about them that you simply couldn't take being acquainted with them any longer so you decided to delete them.

Obsession- Ah yes, the obsession side effect is a most frightening one. This is where the removed Facebooker strolls your page (if it happens to be public) and follows your activity by way of your mutual friends pages. They burst on to threads with volatile, sarcastic commentary, or they do something, anything that will ensure that you see them and hopefully acknowledge their presence. They will slander you openly, subliminally, or cosign the slanderous antics of another all for the sake of letting you know that they're see you, and are watching you. They will inbox you hate speech and insults or passively aggressively do so by way of their status messages. Scary, isn't it?

The Last Word and block- This is when the disgruntled Facebooker in an effort to take one last stab at you, goes to your inbox and spews negative verbiage with the hopes that you'll read it, then block you so you can't respond. This is a cowardly way of getting the last word minus a response.

Jealousy- They become jealous of those whom you still have as friends and/or those who agree with you and begin to insult them. They will refer to them as sheep, boot lickers, cheerleaders, ass kissers, fans, and entourage. Meanwhile, it was alright when they agreed with just about every status.

Memory Loss- This happens when you're dealing with a Facebooker who manages to forget all of their flowery, poetic, love filled, religious, and humanitarian quotes by public figures such as Ghandi, Martin Luther King, Elijah Muhammad, Minister Farrakhan, or those that they may have created themselves. They also forget their religious affiliation and behave totally contrary to it. PTDS has a tendency to cloud ones thinking and the end result is memory loss.

Once we're able to recognize PTDS (Post Traumatic Delete Syndrome), we will able to:

A. Keep from developing it

B. Deal with it when we see it

C. Approach it from an angle of understanding, and possibly offer sound solutions to the problem

D. Recognize it and eradicate it within ourselves

My advice for those who currently suffer from this disorder, know and understand that Facebook is a place of free will to a large degree. People may delete you for a myriad of reasons. That however shouldn't cause you to behave in an unsavory manner nor do you have to become so consumed by your Facebook contacts, especially if you haven't formally had the opportunity to meet with them. No one should have that kind of control over you, require that kind of energy, and occupy that degree of space in your mind. There is life during, after, and beyond Facebook if you go out and get it. Someone deleting you from their friend list should NOT be the end of your world.

So in summation...DON'T BE A CRAZY ASS!

Signed:

Sane Facebook Users